I came dressed for the part. I take my role very seriously. How am I supposed to save the world with this ragtag team?
Who’s in charge of wardrobe here? Who ever heard of Captain America with a blue beaded necklace and a dinosaur bucket?
And who cast this leading lady? This super model princess towers over me. She’s twice my size. What kind of crazy casting agent assigned these parts, anyway?
Goth girl and little witch, get rid of the pink shoes, for crying out loud. You’re making us look soft.
Army dude, wipe that smile off your face. You’re supposed to look menacing. How are we superheroes supposed to be taken seriously?
And cat woman, make up your mind. Are you a cat or a cowgirl? Don’t look at me like that. Lose the flowery boots and the attitude. I don’t have time for this.
Look like me, team! Look tough!
Ugh. Forget it. Stand aside. I guess I’ll have to save the world myself with my plastic ninja sword.